Lobby

I no longer have to lobby the cinema industry for captions on movies. I read in the paper yesterday that one of my local cinemas caters for deaf and blind patrons, YAY! If you are blind they have earphones that give a description of what's happening on the screen and if you are deaf there is a device that you attach to the seat with captions. Now I have to think of something else to lobby for. Stay tuned.

Whispers in the Dark

Today I took the kids to a movie at the cinema. I haven't got around to my intended lobby of the cinema industry to include special screenings of movies with text but it's on my to do list. Anyway, it went surprisingly well as I found I could follow the movie fairly well and could understand most of the dialogue. The hard part was when my youngest tried talking to me half way through the movie. He whispered in my processor (the word processor doesn't sound as romantic as ear, he whispered sweet nothings in my processor .........). I digress, Ayden whispered in my processor and I didn't have a clue what he was talking about. Trouble is, you can't really talk any louder than a whisper in a movie and as I discovered today, I can't hear whispers. There was no other option than for him to wait until the movie was finished or think of some other way to communicate to me what he wanted. Thankfully, he wasn't trying to tell me that he needed to go to the toilet!
After the movie we went to an electronics store to pick up a game remote. These stores are always noisy and at the counter I couldn't hear what the guy was saying to me. I noticed that I've developed a habit of looking at a family member when someone speaks to me and I don't hear them.  Either my family will interpret and tell me what the other person has said or they answer for me. I don't mind either option, I'm just grateful that I have a back-up!

Christmas

Merry Christmas!!
My first deaf Christmas, easily one of the noisiest times of the year. The positive is that most of the noise is excited screaming from children and happy chatter from the adults. I don't think Christmas would be the same for me without the noise that comes with it.
I even tried putting on some Christmas music. Music, especially instrumental, sounds dreadful to me. I endured several Christmas carols until the kids, thank God, turned it off in favour of cartoons on the TV.
When the kids are busy watching TV this gives me the opportunity to turn my CI off for a little silence. As I mentioned before, my tinnitus is all but gone and the wind noise that made life difficult in the early days has gone as well. This means that when I turn my processor off I experience dead silence, total deafness. There are times, at the end of the day or when reading, when total silence is a blessing. It seems strange that I can turn my hearing on and off when I please. At least I can turn it back on!!!!!

I dont have a violin

My youngest son asked me the other day, "do you have a coconut in your violin?" Pardon? "Do you have a coconut in your violin?". I don't have a violin to put a coconut in, I reply. Puzzled look. "Do you have your cochlear implant in?!". Early days.

Tune In

I had an appointment with my audi this morning for a tune-up (official term is mapping). Oh how I love a good tune-up of the ear, well, the electronic device replacing my ear anyway. Each time sounds become a little clearer, especially voices. It's like getting faster internet, only in my case, it's getting a faster clearer brain function for hearing (and understanding). At the moment I'm on a fortnightly plan (attend audi every fortnight) but soon I'll move to a monthly plan.
Another good thing about a tune-up is the tinnitus (the most annoying condition in the world after voices in your head) gets better each time. I hardly hear it now, even when I have the implant off. YAY! Merry Christmas to me, minimal tinnitus!

The Day!

I couldn't blog yesterday. I had one of "those' days and thought that if I blogged I might scare people. You know 'those' days? When you stub your toe, can't find the end to a new roll of toilet paper, fill the car with the wrong petrol. Well I had one of those days but as well as the above I also managed to get sand in my CI (major disaster), get hit in the head with a surfboard, get sunburnt (despite sunscreen), get abused by some bloke who couldn't back up his car without 10 metres of space either side of him and then when I decided to take the dog for a walk to calm myself, someone had already taken off with her! Best not to blog on those types of days!

The Christmas Lunch Debacle

You'll realise why I've called it a debacle (Collins Dictionary: an overwhelming defeat) in a minute.

I arrived at my work Christmas lunch early as planned. I had my name ticked off the list, was given my little card with my pre-ordered vegetarian menu on it and spotted an empty table. Even better, the tables are rectangle which is perfect (round tables are a nightmare), yes! I make a bee-line straight for the far right chair which means nobody can sit on my right side and my CI side is facing the rest of the table. Perfect. Then one of my colleagues pops up in front of me, " Jane, over here, we already have a table". Damn. Move over to their table, spy the far right chair and it's empty, problem is,  my colleagues are sitting further down the table, about four chairs down. Think quick. I have two choices. Choice one is to sit next to them and pray that the person sitting on my right side is mute and doesn't like any social contact. Choice two is to look like an idiot and take the far right chair leaving a gap of four chairs between us. Take the idiot choice and then have to explain why I've chosen to sit four chairs away when they look at me strangely. Surely they've spent the last  24 hours planning how to accomodate my deafness like I have? I'm shocked to realise that not everyone's life revolves around my deafness. Anyway, my kind, understanding colleagues move up happily and leave a space for my husband on my left side (CI side). I'm feeling good, I don't have to worry about the right side, there is no chair there and no chance of anyone ending up there. I don't have to worry about the left side as my husband is sitting there and he doesn't expect any stimulating conversation from me. I spot someone I know walk in and practically fall over myself to get them to sit opposite me. I know I can lipread them if needed.
I'm feeling confident and then I realise that I can't hear a thing, not a single word, oh, except for the (deafening?) background noise that sounds a bit like I'm standing under a jetfighter with it's engines on full. Here we go.............

The lunch lasts three hours, three hours of nodding and smiling and making excuses to leave the conversation (lucky the toilets are nice). I have one conversation that lasts twenty minutes and I have no idea what it was about. A few people try to talk loudly in my CI microphones but this is worse as shouting is distorted by the CI and I can't see their face as they are leaning towards my ear so I can't lipread. I don't blame them when they give up, I would too. Three exhausting hours of pretending that everything is normal, I feel defeated.

As I'm leaving I hug a few of my colleagues and wish them a merry Christmas. One of them says to me "you are my inspiration, I need you to know that". I don't hear a thing for three hours but I hear that.