The Next Challenge

I'd written a long post about how I was worried about attending a live soccer match last weekend and how I wouldn't be able to hear anyone and how lonely I was going to be and how badly the crowd noise would mess with my implant etc etc. Anyway, I went to post it and something went wrong and I attended the soccer without the lead up post to how terrible it was going to be.
I went to the soccer game and had a wonderful time! The crowd noise didn't bother me as I couldn't hear it. I could hear those people standing close to me on my CI side but I couldn't hear the kid yelling at the umpire on my non-CI side. The kids said it was really noisy but it didn't bother me at all. Nobody much wanted to talk to me except the kids (to ask for money to buy junk food) so I just happily watched the game (my team lost) and watched the people walking by. People watching is a favourite activity of deaf people.
Come half time the sky opened and it poured down. My first instinct was to panic about my CI getting wet ($8500 to replace the processor - wouldn't you?). I covered up with my hoodie and my cochlear survived our first rain together.
I must admit, I was delighted to spot a young guy with hearing aids in (I'm constantly searching people's ears for evidence that they are just like me and feel delighted when I spot something) but he seemed more prepared than me and whipped out his rainproof hood. Will learn.
So, turns out that live sport is cochlear friendly, who would have thought?

The Act of Hearing

I've realised this week that I have to make a conscious effort to hear. I have to make an effort to listen, it doesn't just happen. A hearing person just hears, without any effort or particular focus but I can no longer do that. Heaing with the cochlear implant requires complete focus. This was brought home to me this week during a two day professional development workshop I attended. The two days I spent listening and concentrating left me completely exhausted. My brain is so tired I have to fight the urge to go to bed and stay there all day. No wait, maybe I need to give in to the urge just once ...................

What about Steve?

Steve is my long suffering husband. I say long suffering because when he married me and he said the words "for better or worse" I think he was thinking that it would mostly be "better". Anyway, the kids are back at school and sport and with that comes the parent nights, the teacher-parent interviews, school dental appointments, sport registration days, training after school, weekend games and an endless trail of forms that need to be filled out.

While normally I would attend the parent night and attend the interviews and appointments, turn up for sport, and put myself as an emergency contact on all the forms, all that has now changed.

I struggle to hear in any environment that isn't quiet so now, after twelve years, Steve has to step up and fill my "mother" shoes. He already does all the cooking, shopping and cleaning around the house but now he has to take on some of my hearing related tasks as well. He makes all my phone calls for me already but he is now the emergency contact for the kids (well they can hardly ring me can they, I just stand there staring at the phone!). This week alone he has a few nights out with school stuff and two dentist appointments (kids) but he's still taking me out for Valentines Day.
He has a packed schedule but he goes about his jobs as if everything is normal and nothing has changed. Bless him! xx

Can I Still Teach?

Well, I have survived my first day of teaching (tertiary) since going deaf. Not sure if my students can say the same thing!

I taught all day Friday, one group in the morning and a different group in the afternoon. I decided to get the "'I'm deaf" thing out of the way early so to start my session I told them all about myself (like I normally would) and then explained that I wasn't 100% human. This got their attention. I then went on to explain the computer implanted in my head which made me a cyborg (half human and half robot). When I finished my explaination and demonstrated how my CI works I then gave them a few strategies to use when in my class. Raise your hand when I call the roll so I can "see" that you are present. Wait until I move over to you before asking your question (I haven't a hope of hearing them while I'm standing at the front of the room), and always face me when speaking to me. I also reminded them that if they are talking about me behind my back to make sure it is behind my back or I'll lip read them! One other thing I spoke about was to always touch me on the arm or back first before speaking to me rather than call my name.

Anyway, the students all knew about me so I thought I'd turn the tables on them. I could have asked the students what they hoped to get out of the course (yawn) but instead I asked them what made them weird and wonderful. I had no idea what worms would crawl out of that can!!!

I had students share their inner most fears, amazing stories and bizarre things about their bodies (including demonstrations)! One student told me about her experience as a surrogate, one student has pig bone in his leg, I had numerous double jointed students, several that had had near death experiences, several students with strange medical conditions and some with stories that left me with my mouth wide open in disbelief. It was one of the best lessons (and the most fun, boy did we laugh) I've ever taken and I've taught tertiary for 16 years. I think I'm in for an interesting semester!!!!!

Second Day Back

Second day back to work (TAFE), still exhausted but had a good day. I have my first full teaching day on Friday but the small amount of time I've spent talking to the students in the classroom I already know I'm going to have difficulty hearing them.
I've asked my work to purchase an FM system for me to use. These are used in schools for deaf children where the teacher wears a microphone and the students wear a gadget attached to their hearing aid to amplify the teacher's voice.
In my case, I'll wear the gadget on the back of my processor and the microphone will sit at the front of the classroom facing the students. The microphone will transfer the sound (student's voices) directly to my processor, a bit like Bluetooth.
FM systems are expensive but my work seem to think it's a resonable request so I'm excited to think that I'll have this to help me in the classroom.
The next problem is the phone. I can't use a landline so my option is to rely on email and use a mobile so the students can text me. I'm still working on this one but must admit that it's nice not having to stop working to answer the phone all the time. It's also frustrating not having the use of a phone to make a quick call.
So now I'm just getting ready to take my first teaching session on Friday - stay tuned for a full report.

Back to Work

First day back to work today - EXHAUSTED!!!!

My world or yours?

Deaf people often refer to themselves as being part of a culture, a member of the deaf community, the deaf culture. To some extent then, being deaf, just like being a part of any other culture, defines a person. While normally, disability shouldn't define a person, I'm finding that my deafness does exactly that. It has changed my behaviour, my communication, my feelings, my routines, and even to some extent my values and beliefs. It has certainly changed my view of the world and how I function in it.

My deafness allows me to do things that hearing people can't, sleep through loud snoring for example, and stops me from doing things hearing people can, use the telephone for example. It dictates what job I have (call centre operator could be a bit tricky), how I communicate with people (get ready to repeat yourself people!), how I parent my kids (they have to wait until we are in a quiet environment to talk),and also my attitudes (sounds mean but I'm over people complaining about minor stuff wrong with them - how about we trade? Didn't think so). I've become very quiet in large groups, but I'm obnoxiously loud in other situations.

 My deafness is starting to define who I am and I can fully understand why deafness becomes a culture. It's a whole other world, both good and bad, but a whole other world. x